I’ve been thinking about some of the demons I’ve had to slay to make progress in my walk with God. Have you ever reflected on this? What things have you overcome? What do you still need to overcome? I’ve fought many battles. Some I have won, and others have been a personal nemesis that defeated me until I learned how to conquer them. Then there are those I am still working on, or have yet to face.
Here are some of the challenges I’ve had to overcome. Hopefully, if some of you are fighting the same battles, you’ll find some encouragement here.
1. Unbelief vs. Faith
I used to have to understand God. When I gave up, I felt much better. Now I’m at peace, and He can do whatever He wants. I know He loves me, and if I keep my eyes on Him, it will all work out. When things go wrong, too many people ask the wrong question: “If God is so good, why did He allow this to happen?” Instead, I’ve learned to ask “If God is so bad, why did He die on the cross for me, a sinner, when He did no wrong?” Spend your time doing things that build your faith, not undermine it. Read your Bible, and believe it. Watch the words you allow out of your mouth. Resist unbelief. Don’t put more trust in the words of the “experts” than you put in God.
2. Feelings vs. Convictions
This is one obstacle many Christians never get past. If you can’t beat this one, you’ll never grow to maturity. Your feelings are big fat liars, pants on fire. Get biblical. Get convictions. Get truth & wisdom. Live by this, not what your emotions and desires tell you. If you can’t worship God just because you don’t feel like it, you’ve got a serious spiritual problem. If you’re not willing to forgive someone, or to go to church, or read your Bible and pray, you must understand the difference between convictions and feelings, and make a choice to live by convictions. When you first begin to do this, what a protest your flesh will assualt you with! But stick with it, and the word of God will prove true to you, as it has for millions of others, and your feelings will just have to come in line. Continue in this, and it will become easier over time, and you will build godly character.
3. Bitterness vs. Forgiveness
I’ve always been a pretty black and white kind of guy. That’s why I used to find it hard to forgive. I’m quite loyal, and so for a long time I expected the same undying loyalty from others. There were certain actions that to me were unthinkable. If anyone crossed my invisible line of tolerance, I would write them off. After I came to Christ, I had to deal with this quickly. Since then, I’ve learned the joy of forgiveness. One of my secrets to forgiving easily is to pray for those I need to forgive. Try it! You’ll be amazed at how God gives you his heart for them.
Remember to give people the benefit of the doubt. Few people do wrong intentionally. There is almost always a sincere reason behind their actions. They may not even know what they’re doing is wrong (Somebody famous once prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”) Do you know what the definition of an idiot is? Someone who doesn’t know something you learned 5 minutes ago! All of us are works in progress, so give somebody a break, and put the pointy finger away.
I’ve also learned that forgiving someone does not always mean you have to stay in close relationship with that person, and be their doormat. There’s a fine line here, but it’s possible to forgive someone and still exercise wisdom in keeping a safe distance. You can’t get along with someone who doesn’t want to be gotten along with. Release them for now, and pray for God to do a work in their hearts.
4. Shame vs. Grace
The meaning of “Satan” in Hebrew is “accuser.” He will dog you day and night, if you let him. Yes, the very one who tempts you to sin is the one who belittles you for giving in. Shame is a terrible prison. It robs you of peace, confidence, anointing, and sleep. Shame is more profound than guilt. Guilt has to do with what you’ve done. Shame has to do with what you are. There have been many times I’ve been deeply ashamed of myself. Like you, I’ve felt God didn’t want to or wouldn’t forgive me. In those times, I felt so far from God, I wondered if I was even saved, or ever had been. Of course, these were lies, but they were powerful ones indeed! Thank God for His grace! Ah, the unmerited, undeserved favour of God! Ha ha! He broke my prison bars and smashed the rocks in pieces. What a joy when I learned to be God’s wretch – to be paraded around his courts, unworthy, but the object of his special affection, not that I might be exalted, but that his Grace and Power to utterly save might be put on display for all to see!
5. Depression vs. Joy
Some of you may not know I suffered for years with terrible bouts of depression. That’s right. I was in group therapy at the University of Alberta hospital in Edmonton, taking Prozac. I wish I could say it all went away the day I came to Christ, but I can’t. Sure, I was markedly improved, but it took years of prayer and renewing my mind before I was healed. I understand what some of you go through when you can’t even pray, and there seems to be no hope. I know what it means to not feel God for weeks on end. I know what it means to want to hide from people, and even avoid going to church, because it feels impossible to lift your hands and sing. I couldn’t smile, I couldn’t laugh, and I wanted to die. Before I asked Christ into my life, I used to get drunk, party with my friends, and then fall down in a field somewhere and cry for God to kill me, because I couldn’t find any reason worth living for. But now I can honestly say I am totally healed – set free by the Risen Christ! How liberating to know joy again, and have a stable mind. Thank you Jesus, for setting me FREE!!
6. Fear of Man vs. Fear of God
Like you, I like to be understood. However, there are people in my life that will never understand me. But then, how could they? They’re not God. I’ve learned to release them, and I’m comfortable with the fact that sometimes, only God will fully understand me. One thing I’ve also learned as a pastor is that people have a lot of expectations that are unrealistic. And then I have my own expectations….and I don’t meet those either. I still battle with this one occasionally, but I’ve made a lot of progress, and I’m able now to catch myself when it rears its ugly head. Some of the lessons along the way are…..don’t compare yourself with others, don’t substitute man’s expectations for God’s, and be true to who you are, whether they understand you or not.
I’ve also noticed that some people treat me differently when I seem to be meeting their expectations. They praise me, they want to be around me, etc. But when I don’t meet their expectations, the same people are distant and act like I’m yesterday’s news. I’ve got a sticker on my fridge that says, “If you’re going to walk on thin ice, you may as well dance!” I love this saying, because it sums up an important lesson I’ve learned: don’t live solely to please people, because you’ll never be free to be who God created you to be.
7. Negative vs. Positive
You can’t have a positive life and a negative mind. This is one of the major things that helped me to overcome depression. Only you can change your attitude….even God won’t do it for you. Consider….your attitude is one of the most powerful things about you that you have the power to change, but it’s also one of the easiest things to change about you! Just decide to think, believe and confess what God says about you and your world, whether you feel like it or not. Talk about lots of bang for you buck!
I could share a lot more, but nobody wants to read a long blog, and I’m afraid I may already have overstayed my welcome. As a final note, I’d like to encourage you to keep going – no matter what you’re facing. Persevere, run to God even when you want to run away, and trust Him. If you are facing any of these obstacles, rely on Christ and His word, and this too, shall pass.
[Originally posted Dec. 8, 2008 at occonline.ca]
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